What to Expect at the Ritual of Grief and Eros

This ritual may be unlike other experiences you’ve attended. Please read these guidelines for what to expect so you can see if this is for you.

1. What the ritual is and is not

This is a group ritual to move energy and to open our hearts. The intention is to heal so we have more vitality and love to share.

This is a ritual that partners with the wisdom of the body. The focus is not so much to tell stories about what you are grieving. It is a time to use movement, sound, and touch to transform what you are grieving.

It is a space that honours your full expression including your grief, laughter, and erotic energy. You are welcome to move and make sounds as you let go of tension. Yes, you are welcome to experience arousal and joy. There is no “right way to grieve.” This is a space where you can ask for touch that supports your grieving.

This is not a space with a focus on erotic connection. However, it is an opportunity to ask for touch that supports you to grieve. It is not 2 way touch, when you are grieving you are only receiving touch,not giving it back. You do not need to ask for or offer touch in order to fully participate. You can always say no to a request. There is great power in simply witnessing without touch. There will be no nudity in this workshop.

If you are supporting/witnessing someone grieving you are simply providing what is asked for to the extent that you are comfortable. You are not “fixing” or “healing” someone. You are supporting the wisdom of their body and their unique way of grieving. Your touch is not for your own arousal it is in service to what the person who is grieving wants.

2. Our approach

This ritual is inspired by the work of Zahava Griss, who is in turn inspired by Sobonfu Some’s grief rituals of the Dagara Tribe. It also includes embodiment practices and vocal practices to open the body and support grieving and integration. We recognize that the trembling of crying, laughing, and orgasm are all similar in the body. This trembling is an opening for transformation and healing. We partner with the wisdom of the body. We see eros as desire, enthusiasm and excitement, the natural part of us that shares joy, play, and the essence of who we really are. We welcome it into the space because it helps us to free up energy and open our hearts.

3. Sobriety

It goes without saying that we ask that you refrain from using alcohol or recreational drugs before and for the duration of the ritual. This does not include prescription medications you are taking. The ritual creates a shared group experience that we ask you to be fully present for.

4. Integration

Everyone has a unique experience grieving. It can be common to want deep rest after the ritual. It is wise to create gentleness for yourself the next few days. Salt baths, time in nature, nourishing foods, spaciousness in your schedule, and time with loved ones are all great ways to support your integration. You might consider scheduling time with a loved one in the day or two following the ritual so you can share about your experience.